Bridges and Trust



My awesome friend has an amazing husband who has a talented camera eye. She affectionately calls him her Mon'Kee...and this photo was taken by him. He has his own blog and I plan to feature his photos which inspire me to write....such as this one:  "Footbridge at Occoquan"

 When i saw this picture my first thought was, "what is on the other side of that bridge?" Just staring down the path in the picture, it has this tunnel vision effect- you can't see what's below it or on either side of it. Can't really even see the path on the other end, all you see are thick trees with no clue what else is out there beyond what the eye sees.  Taking that first step to cross that bridge would take an act of strength and faith.  Would the bridge remain steady and true?  Would the view as you crossed it be beautiful and breathtaking, making you think, "wow, if I hadn't started to cross, i would have missed this!"  And, once on the other side, would the path take me someplace amazing?  What's behind me and do I want to look back or just take that first step?

Anyone who truly knows me knows I have a fear of bridges.  Not all bridges mind you...just the scary ones.  :) There are places in the world where a simple bridge connects a remote village to civilization.  There are bridges which traverse swollen white water rapids which couldn't be crossed otherwise.  Bridges like these are neccessary to the survival of the people who need to use them.  These bridges cross insurmountable obstacles that a simple person may not be able to cross on their own. 

All in all, they fulfill a higher purpose....so what's my deal?

**rope bridges will probably never be crossed by me unless my life undoubtly depended on it.  I don't trust them, they're flimsy, no support...moments away from falling apart in my mind.  Not dependable and unreliable.
**old railway tressle bridges - yes, they were constructed to support trains crossing them over and over again, but for me to cross it?  forget about it.  The potential to trip, slip and fall through the tressle paralyzes me with fear.  There is a bridge in Maine that I was asked to walk across...think I got about 6 feet across, stopped, got on my hands and knees, cried and crawled back to the safety of the road.  I don't like the idea that if I have a clumsy moment, the bridge under my feet may disappear when I need it most.
**two lane bridges over water with only a jersey wall and no shoulder to pull off on...seriously?  Total devestating disaster is written all over this bridge.  All it takes is someone in the other lane, traveling way too fast...the head on collision or the swerve into (or through) the jersey wall would be the end of me.  Someone else's mistake and the bridge not offering any support or safety net or protection from a life altering mistake.

For me to be able to travel a bridge - footbridge or vehicle bridge, it needs to be sturdy, dependable, stable, with a place to pull to the side for a breather if neccessary.  It needs to make me feel confident, secure, safe... kind of what I expect out of people who come into my life.  So, my inability to cross a bridge is a testimony to my insecurities in things I can't control.  I don't trust what I don't know... making huge strides to change my life will take a strong, dependable, safe bridge to support me as I cross from one side to the other.